By yourself, yet not alone: Making space for loneliness

Abstract

Urban designers often aim to reduce the subjective feeling of loneliness through more opportunities for social interaction in (semi-)public space. These approaches may benefit people who feel lonely because they are socially isolated, but they neglect a wide range of other loneliness experiences. Indeed, there are various reasons for feeling lonely, which can often not (quickly) be erased by more social contact. Strikingly, many lonely people have even been found to prefer, and sometimes benefit from, spending time by themselves. This does, however, not imply that they necessarily prefer to remain in private space. Trying to ‘plan away’ aloneness and negative feelings – as visual representation of loneliness – from public space may then exacerbate loneliness: it signals that lonely people are alone with their experiences and can exclude them from the community of people using the same space. We therefore propose a ‘paradoxical loneliness intervention’, where more space for loneliness eases its painfulness. More specifically, we offer ideas for spaces that cater to the diverse needs of lonely people by (1) de-stigmatising loneliness, (2) providing opportunities to reflect on loneliness, (3) allowing the development pf a sense of belonging and (4) allowing a mental escape of loneliness.