Multiple Facets of Rejections in Online Dating: Exploring Types, Reasons, and Impact

Abstract

Romantic rejections are a hurtful yet common occurrence in online dating. While research in this area is growing, there is a need for a comprehensive and comparative overview to understand these rejection experiences better. This article presents the results of two cross-sectional survey studies that aimed to create a more comprehensive overview of multiple facets of rejections in online dating, particularly the types of rejections used, the (provided) reasons for rejecting, and the painfulness of being rejected. Results of Study 1 (n = 177) show that ghosting was the most often experienced rejection type, even when a considerable number of messages was exchanged before the rejection. Unmatching/blocking and rejections with an explanation occurred less but equally often. Moreover, individuals who experienced rejections with an explanation reported the highest painfulness rates, which raised important questions about the reasons behind such explicit rejections. Study 2 further unpacked the provided rejection reasons, from the rejecter and the rejectee perspective. Five categories were identified among the reasons, such as (lack of) attraction and reasons related to relationship investment. Several interesting discrepancies that emerged between reasons provided by rejecters versus rejectees are discussed. Our work underlines the multifaceted nature of rejection experiences in online dating and sets directions for future research that further explores the relationships between rejection types, reasons, and painfulness in detail.